Congruity in Communication

Author, Nicholas Boothman, reminds us in his book "How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less," that congruity in communication is essential to making connections. By this he means that your words, voice tone, and body language must all be saying the same thing to be believed.

Consider the facial expressions and voice tones that you use in communicating to others and make sure that your tones and body language back up the content of what you are saying. If you just act naturally, congruity should follow. Be careful to limit sarcasm which, by definition, mixes opposite messages sent through words and tone.

To create a sense of openness, work on establishing a posture and tonality of honesty and empathy. Concentrate on making the communication about the idea and not about yourself. Make people like you by following the advice found in Boothman's book.

Content

In all forms of communication, content is the most important element. It is what you say, what you write, or what you broadcast that matters the most. It is even more important that how you say it.

This is not to discount the importance of non-verbal communication in face-to-face communication because that is a very influential element of communication also. But the content of the message is still the essence of communication.

We surround ourselves with very large-screen plasma or LED televisions with surround sound. We go to theaters with state-of-the art audio video presentation. We read books and magazines on electronic devices.

Still, the most important aspect of communication is the content. I would rather watch a very interesting tv show on a 19-inch color tv, than a mediocre or bad show in a home theater.

Just like in the publishing business, content is the key element in all communication.

Connecting

How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less is the title of the book that I just started reading by author Nicholas Boothman. Having listened to the audio book about connecting in business by Boothman, I was already familiar with some of his concepts about interacting with other people.

After the first four chapters, it is clear that his ideas for connecting in business are very similar to connecting in all areas of life. So far, the advice about making people like you really sounds more like making yourself likable and making an effort to connect with others.

The advice given so far is great stuff and this is going to be a book that I strongly recommend to everyone. He has already explained the same KFC method as in his business book. Know what you want, find out what you are getting, and change what you do until you get what you want.

It sounds like common sense but Boothman explains this pattern of behavior in a way that makes me want to read on. Please check back for further comments.

Finding Your Strengths

It is important for a person to know his or her strengths. Of course, everyone is different and all people have different skill sets. All individuals differ from everyone else in their talents. We all have a unique set of knowledge.

Understanding your skills, knowing your talents, and building your knowledge are all keys to success and satisfaction. Just because you are very interested in one thing, your interest alone will not make you great at that activity. I always liked sports but I was never really good at any of them. It was not until I understood that playing sports was not my strength that I enjoyed playing them.

Consider the amount of practice time that goes into making a high school or college sports team. Is all of that time really worth it for the individual? Maybe. On the other hand, if that same individual really understood what his or her strength was and spent the same amount of time developing it as practicing that sport, what would be the outcome.

One of the most important kind of coaching a person can get is the assistance in understanding their strengths and how to use them. Most people have several strengths and should be able to find more than one that they really like.

The Boy Who Harnessed the Wind

I just finished this very intersting book by William Kamkwamba. He is a young man from Malawi in Africa and he came from a very poor farming family. Because his family was too poor to send him to school, he studied on his own.

He studied and studied until he was able to build and create things out of junk and other existing materials. He build a windmill that made him known around the world.

This book clearly illustrates the suffering brought on by famine. Told from William's perspective, I gained a new insight into what famine is all about and how devistating it can be on a society.

I also learned a lot about determination as shown by William throughout the story. I highly recommend this book as it will teach things that you don't expect from the title.

Have Balance

It is very important to have balance in your life. You have a work life, home life, spiritual life, recreational life, social life, and more. It is important and necessary to balance all of these areas.

If you overdo it on your work life, the others will suffer and you will be out of balance. Not only do the other areas of your life suffer, your work life will suffer too because it is actually nurtered by balance.

Work toward balance.

What goes in makes a big difference

Think of all of the things that you witness, see, hear, and watch every day. Now think of how much of that is negative. How much is criticism, complaining, negative, vulgar, or immoral. All of this has an effect on what comes out.

Even if you did nothing to seek negative input, it will find you. Even if you only passively seek positive input, negative input will breech that. Just flip through the channels of your TV from one end to the other and count the violence, criticism, and one sidedness that you see. This all has a negative affect on you.

Seek positive influence. Take special care of what goes into your mind so that what comes out has a better chance of being positive.